Dear alpha mom,
We are not you. We try to be you, or rather, we tried for a long time. Then we got too tired, and in some cases, too full of rage. Our cars weren’t clean enough. There may or may not have always been the smell of old bottles and, that one time, dried out sushi. Our husbands may or may not have been rich enough. Our houses would most definitely not be the appropriate venue for hosting your Junior League lunch, and could be considered, as you once said, “Nobody’s Dream House.” So now we are reconciled as to our role in life. We’re the beta moms. We’re not the Chairs, mostly. We’re the Committee. And when we are the Chairs, which actually does happen sometimes, it drives You crazy. You might have accused us of overreaching. More likely, You might not even have noticed us, except to note that we downright suck, in many cases. And lest You chalk us off more sympathetically as Working Moms, well, we’re mostly not even that either. We might have had an interesting job, once, a long time ago. We might even have one now, but that’s really not the point here. The point is, we’re not too proud to admit that we’re the ones who forgot to pick up carpool that day and left all the kids waiting at school. Yes we did bring the wrong number of cupcakes to girl scouts so one girl cried. And yes, we may or may not have let someone watch Fairytopia Mermaidia, over and over and over again, in the car while we talked on the phone. It probably goes without saying that we might have forgotten to send someone to preschool today, thinking it was vacation. (It’s not.)
And here’s the other thing; since we’re not You, You are probably not us, either. Sure, we might even have friends, or more likely, frenemies, who are Alpha like You. But the main difference between You and us is, we tivo’d American Idol this week. We own the Project Runway Barbie Nick designed last season, along with the full dvd set of season one. And Tyra, she may not be Beta, but girl, she is Fierce.
sleep, kids, and caffeine.